I got this as a joke email at work yesterday, and I thought I’d share it for fun. Don’t get offended. I chuckled at a few, because I got a few of these in the past week. I’m not easy to live with.
1. Fine
This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
2. Five Minutes
If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
3. Nothing
This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with Nothing usually end in Fine.
4. Go Ahead
This is a dare, not permission. Don’t Do It!
5. Loud Sigh
This is not actually a word, but it is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing.
(Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)
6. That’s Okay
This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. “That’s okay” means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
7. Thanks
A woman is thanking you, do not question it or faint. Just say you’re welcome.
8. Whatever
Is a woman’s way of saying F*&@ YOU!
9. Don’t worry about it, I got it
Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but she is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking “What’s wrong?”
For the woman’s response refer to #3.