I got this as a joke email at work yesterday, and I thought I’d share it for fun.  Don’t get offended.  I chuckled at a few, because I got a few of these in the past week.  I’m not easy to live with.

1. Fine

This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

2. Five Minutes

If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

3. Nothing

This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with Nothing usually end in Fine.

4. Go Ahead

This is a dare, not permission. Don’t Do It!

5. Loud Sigh

This is not actually a word, but it is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing.
(Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)

6. That’s Okay

This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. “That’s okay” means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

7. Thanks

A woman is thanking you, do not question it or faint. Just say you’re welcome.

8. Whatever

Is a woman’s way of saying F*&@ YOU!

9. Don’t worry about it, I got it

Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but she is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking “What’s wrong?”

For the woman’s response refer to #3.

I’m proud to announce that I’ve lost 4 lbs. in 4 weeks, which (if you can’t do the math) is 1 pound a week.  That is sustainable, doable, inscrutable, and not bamboozle-able.

I’m really happy for myself, and I’m gonna keep it going.  I was so thrilled that instead of walking before yoga today, I ran for 20 mins.  I was fired up the rest of the day.  Sure, I’m feeling it now — achy ankles and feet, sore leg muscles, but I reiterate.  “Yea!”

Minnie Leia? Ewww.

Ok, what is up with George Lucas? The man has been merchandising everything under the sun related to the Star Wars franchise.  As the owner, it’s his right, but shouldn’t he draw the line at the most ridiculous ones?  Case in point: Star Wars Disney character statues.  Mickey Luke, Minnie Leia, Goofy Chewie, and Donald in Carbonite? Why, George?  Why?

Minnie Leia does not do it for me.  It’s like seeing Ross’ mother dressed up as Leia all over again.

The first review is out on U2’s new album, No Line on the Horizon.”  The review is not that good.  It’s not terrible, but the reviewer felt the album was “mostly restless, tentative and confused. ”    I’ll wait for a few more reviews, and a chance for myself to hear some of the songs with my own two ears. U2’s 1997 album Pop was pretty well-maligned, but I didn’t think it was that bad.  I’ll take that back  — I’ll admit that I only liked, hmmm, three songs on the album, which is dismal.

After an almost five-year absence, during which Bono was named one of TIME’s Persons of the Year for his work on global poverty and the group was inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame, the band returns on March 3 with an album called No Line on the Horizon. It offers up a few new hits for the wedding playlist, but No Line on the Horizon is mostly restless, tentative and confused. It’s not terrible, but it feels like the work of musicians torn between the comfort of the present and the lure of one last run into the adventurous past.

Let’s hope for the best.  No Line on the Horizon will be released next week on March 3rd.

I’m posting, because it’s about my family’s home state of Kerala, India.

After 26 years as a nun, Jesme Raphael gave up her robes and walked out of the Congregation of the Mother of Carmel, the Catholic order in Kerala, India, that had been her home for three decades. Two years later, Raphael, now 53, has come out with her memoirs, Amen: An Autobiography of A Nun, cataloging lurid details of bullying, sexual abuse and homosexuality in the oldest Catholic women’s order in the idyllic coastal state in southern India. Shocking as it is, the book is only the latest in a long series of accusations and scandals afflicting the Catholic Church in the state with the largest population of Christians in India.

The article is A Former Nun’s Memoirs Rock India’s Catholic Church. I’m not surprised, but I’m irritated by the nonchalant and dismissive attitude of some of the clergy and others within the Catholic church.  Very typical of some of these people who want to deny the problem, and simply hope the problem goes away.

I found this on Gizmodo.  Funny, in a nutty sort of way. How does a one-term US Senator become President of the United States and enter office with crazy approval ratings? Previously unseen footage reveals Obama’s secret: the Autobot Matrix of Leadership. Dang.

So is he now Obama Prime?

ST: TNG cast on Family Guy

Nerdgasm alert.  In the upcoming March 29th 2009 episode of Family Guy, Not All Dogs Go to Heaven, the show will feature the cast of Star Trek: The Next Generation. Lending their voices and likenesses will be Patrick Stewart, Levar Burton, Gates McFadden, Michael Dorn, Wil Wheaton, Denise Crosby, Marina Sirtis, Brent Spiner and Jonathan Frakes.

Awesome!

Oh come on, I was looking forward to this movie.  Don’t tell me that the movie doesn’t work.  I hope this is a one-off situation, and others like it.  Even then, unless the reviews are horrible, I’ll most likely still go see it.

Review: Watchmen’s faithful film adaptation may prove that Alan Moore was right after all | SCI FI Wire.

Argh.  Wait.  Don’t wait.  Wait. Don’t wait.  The price may be cut in a few days?  In April?  By June?  More here at PC World.com.

Brain…..suffering…aneurysm.  Must….finish……last…..cookie…….ACK!

There is so much good music out there.

Do you realize how much music is out there?  I’ve been listening to my music collection this week, and while I enjoy the popular music that you hear on the radio, I equally enjoy the indie/electronic/rock music that I’m finding through alternative channels.  The free music through CNET’s Download.com, or friends collections, or sometimes the stuff you can just stumble into. 

Case in point.  Last year while visiting Toronto, we walked into a place where they were handing out free CDs by this local DJ who goes by the name “DJ Undercover.”  You know how good a free CD could be, but we didn’t throw it away.  We ended up listening to it in the rental car’s CD player the whole week.  Great electronic dance music mix, and because one night we were there in Toronto.  Go figure.

The music you listen and find through alternative means may never get any popular recognition, but it’s good.  How would the regular Joe the Plumber ever find it?  It makes me realize how much else is out there that we have no idea about, but would probably love if we knew about it and were exposed to it.